My daughter turned 15 this week. On her birthday she posted this picture on her Instagram account. The first thing that I was struck with was how incredibly adorable she was. I mean stop it, that kid was just perfect. I remember this trip to London. This was the start of our adventure. We were months from leaving Portugal to head to Australia.
The girl in this picture was so full of life. The joy is just oozing out of her. I will be honest, the teenager that she has become is more reserved. Don’t get me wrong. She still has the best laugh, a quick mind, a fantastic sense of humor and an authentic heart. She is a hard worker and a trustworthy loyal friend. But I see that the world has changed her a bit.
Lana, dad and I hope that our travels and moves have enriched your life. But looking at this picture I wonder if we also robbed you of some of the simplicity that could have been your life. Rather than growing up with the same set of friends, you have known what it means to walk into a room of strangers and have to forge a path for yourself. You have done it so many times. You are aware that people are looking at you, judging you and you, therefore, you make decisions on how to behave based on how you will be perceived. That is natural and normal. But please remember my darling girl just how incredibly beautiful YOU, the real YOU is. Please remember the joy and exuberance of that you felt in this photograph and live that. Those around you who are worth your time will see the beauty in you and those will be the people worth your laughter, your intelligence, and your joy.
I love you and I always will.
I started a meditation practice last year. It was helpful, but I was not as consistent as I should be with it. I am trying to make it a priority this year. This was the core message I worked on today. This is a tough one for me, but I am trying.
One of the most inspiring people on social media is Robin Arzon. I can not remember how I discovered her on Instagram, but the minute I did, I was hooked. Every darn post she shares is inspiring. She is unabashedly fierce, proud and strong.
Last winter she challenged herself (and everyone) to run 3 miles every day for the 31 days of December. I thought it was cool, but I knew I would not be able to fit it into my schedule. This year when she reissued the challenge, I knew that even though the timing was wrong, (I was going to be a solo mom for two of the weeks in December) that I simply had to do it. Rather than deter me from the idea, the madness of the timin drew me further into the challenge. I knew that if I did not sign up that I would miss numerous workouts because of the hectic holiday season and then I would end the year feeling unfit and defeated. I took on the challenge and I’m happy to say that for 28 of the 31 days I found time to run, hop on a Stairmaster or cycle (I doubled the miles those days).
Some days this meant working out in the evening which I hate doing, but I did it. And then I did it again. And then I did it again. I finished the year feeling better than I would have had I not accepted this challenge. And that my friends, is why I will do it again.
This is the chart that I posted to keep me honest and on track.
Since arriving in the States we I have thought numerous times of posting to kiwigalo, but life always seemed to get in the way of my making time for myself. This endeavor is something I do to chronicle my life and my thoughts. I do it for myself, but also for my children. I know Lana has often come here to scroll through our memories and I believe she has gotten to know me better by reading my words. They are not eloquent, rather they are simple, but they are mine.
I am not here to make any promises to anyone that I will be posting often. No, I am here to remind myself that my life continues to be an adventure even if I am living back at home. I took the above photo quite randomly after getting myself and Sophia a coffee while in NYC. This image keeps coming to mind. I have no idea what this year holds for me. But oddly, I know that there will be big changes. Sometimes it is rattling in our soul, something only perceived to ourselves that constitutes the greatest change. And I feel it.
Happy New Year.