This past Tuesday I had my third chemo session. The day before treatment I got my bags all packed. As I approached the bags I felt sick to my stomach. I knew that it was psychosomatic, but the feeling was real. 

I am not sure what it was but this past treatment was not fun. I felt uncomfortable and was really bothered by the cold cap treatment. At the end of the treatment, all I wanted to do is go home and wash the ickiness off of me. Unfortunately because of my Neulasta patch, I couldn’t shower for 27 hours. If you know one thing about me is that I like to shower at least once a day. I was simply miserable. 

With each new day comes the opportunity to come back to center, for me, it is the time I spend reading the Bible and in prayer. I started yesterday off beautifully. I stayed busy as I held out for that evening shower. So it was with some dismay that so much hair was falling out in the shower. 

It has been a little over a week that I have noticed hair loss. This was something that I was trying to avoid with the cold cap treatment. On Tuesday there were no bald spots which is really great. But yesterday night was different. I am balding in spots. After a bit of a cry, I shared the news with Stephen, the kids, and my siblings. Funny, calling the, was more about giving them a heads up that I was going to look different than it was an act of self-consolation. 

You see, this is hard, but I have God by my side and I know that this hair loss means that the chemo is working. I want this cancer GONE! If it takes my hair so be it. Just leave me cancer!