The highest compliment I have ever received was paid to me by mother. I remember it vividly. I was riding down Federal Road in my dad’s Chevy S10 pickup with my mom and John Amaral. They were chatting about something and I heard her say that I was a gift. I quickly responded “Some gift.” Not only did know that I was an ‘unplanned’ pregnancy, but truth be told, at the time I was a teenage pain in my mother’s butt. But she very seriously responded that in fact yes, I was a gift. She explained that exactly that in 1974, one month after the death of my brother Manny (18), a death that devastated my family, I turned 3. She said that no one in our family wanted to celebrate, but that I forced them to. I forced smiles. I have thought about that this past week. Last Friday something changed dramatically in America. But that change came at the cost of too many lives. Too many brave educators. Too many babes lost. I watched as my community was torn apart. I watched from a distance. A distance that allowed me the luxury to step away form the pain. The luxury of shielding my babies from horrors that are not imaginable, but will live in the nightmares of so many who survived it, who had to face the loss of loved ones and who were first responders. But today I come home to this community. I am scared. I don’t want my kids to see me cry. But I know that each time I see a friend we will both know exactly what the other is thinking of. I know tears will flow. I know we will hug for longer than we would had this horror not come. But I do think of my kids. I think of Dawn Lafferty Hochsprung who I am very confident would want us to seize this opportunity. She would want us to make America better, to change gun laws, to give help to those individuals who are broken. She would want us to seize the day. I am sure of it. I am also sure that Dawn would want us to smile. For George to be happy, for Erica and Cristina to live their lives to the fullest. To be as fabulous and as accomplished as their mother. So if you see me smile when I see you please do not think for a minute that I am heartless and that I do not feel for the parents and families who have lost so much. Please do not think that. Just know that my smile means that I missed you. That I am happy to see you and that I have hope that there is still more good than bad in this world. We just all need to do a better job bringing that forward. God Bless and Happy Holidays to you all. I love you…I really do.